It takes so long to get through the chores towards actual life that I think I might just give up.

1. Called Grandma to ask if I could send her my jewellery to be mended at her jewellers. She said yes.

2. Found jewellery. Sorted it. Packed it up into parcel.

3. Packed Flo's Christmas present into parcel.

4. Went to Post Office and sent parcels.

5. Stopped at T-mobile to ask why I can't send/receive picture messages. They said to update sync-ing software, then update phone software. Which might 'possibly' work. Or buy a new phone.

6. Have to work out how much all housemates owe for water bill until end June and email all bank details.

7. Have to work out how much all housemates owe for tv licence and email all bank details.

8. Have to wash bedding.

9. Have to put rubbish out.

10. Have to vacuum house and clean bathroom.

11. BORED of chores now. Don't think this quite counts as real life and definitely doesn't count as doing formative due next Mon or summative due next Mon.

12. CROSS.

My February Vogue favourite picks

-Chanel

-Versus (Christopher Kane for Versace)

-Lanvin (Albert Elbaz is my hero!)

-Prada

-Ralph Lauren (of course)

-Alberta Ferretti

-By Malene Birger

-Stella McCartney

-Balmain

-Alexander McQueen

-Moschino

(All Spring/Summer 2010, Ready-To-Wear)

Bathing. Discuss.

Just had a bath. Baffling.

The bath foam of choice; my male housemate's Adidas 'ice' shower gel, yummy.

The hairstyle of choice; strangely domesticated-looking Austrian-style wound-around-head plait.

The literature of choice?

1. The Second Sex, Simone de Beauvoir - 2nd page hilarity "in many species the male appears to be fundamentally unnecessary".

2. Feb. edition of Vogue - of which the preview of the Spring 2010 collections left me in such a fever of excitement that I only accidentally discovered that it was twenty to two (a.m.), I had shrivelled rather, and ought to be Getting Out Of The Bath.

What does all, and any, of this Mean??

Oh dear.

p.s. Wels I think I may have left my M&S fleur de lys tights as well. Could you please send up a care package enclosing the Communist Manifesto, said tights, and please please some Belazu Balsamic? They don't have it anywhere near the wilds of Durham and the only online stockist says $50 which is obviously Ridiculous. xxx

Boxing Day

Total failure yesterday, which, according to the rest of the family is how we usually do Boxing Day.

Set off post-Gates-work to Meadowhall (horrid enormous shopping place) to visit M&S. The intentions were threefold. Firstly, to help grandma find a coat. Secondly for Alice and I to exchange M&S Christmas presents. Thirdly, to purchase anything else excitingly saleified...

Apparently Grandma requests the coat finding every year.

We got there. M&S was shut. Mother claims this non-trip is an annual event. I just don't understand why! If it happened last year, and the year before, why would it be fun to repeat the disappointment?! Baffling.

So we wandered around Sheffield city centre instead, which was shutting rapidly and had not much to offer in the way of attractive purchases (how has Next not gone bust yet??) but was looking rather pretty and then shot off for a jolly meal and to Sherlock Holmes.

Go and see Sherlock Holmes. It is very good. The dresses are awesome. Jude Law is hot when he's a doctor. and the banter between him and Robert Downey Jr. is brilliant.

Sample script; Angry Jude Law to RDJ - "You keep stealing my clothes!" RDJ (in outrage) - "I operate a barter system!"

Also, he may be slightly wrinkly now, but RDJ has the amusing, intelligent, roue look down to a t.

Off you go. Yes, now.

Christmas Day

Spent far too long on Christmas Day with my hand up a capon's bottom.

NOT what Father Christmas intended.

(FYI: Wiki tells us that a capon is a castrated rooster. Yikes)

Jacqueline, me and Rosie's hat pre-boat-drenching

Sunshiney time before the giant wave attack...